Friday, October 02, 2009

Postitive Discipline

So we crossed that threshold, the terrible twos. They haven't been too bad just yet. I think that is because Darrian was really testing limits back in May-July. He seems to sort of get what I am trying to tell him now. It sometimes takes longer than I would like, but we are a work in progress. I feel like I needed to get ahead of the 8 ball, so I signed up with a friend of mine to take some parenting classes. I was pretty impressed that the local community city classes had some that fit what I was looking for.

Here is a description of what I took:

Building relationships between parent and child is not always easy . Workshop will focus on the following topics; making good behaviour the norm not the exception, when to use material rewards and when to use intangible rewards, taking emotions out of disciplining and setting limits.

It was interesting, and I learned some pointers. It seems most important to be consistent, there were parents in the class with children 7 & 10 years old that are still dealing with (in one form or another) what I see in Darrian. It seemed in order to be successful in setting boundaries you have to decide what route your going to take and stick with it. We talked a lot about how the words "no, and don't" affect children and self esteem. (and how they tune you out as soon as they hear those words)

At one point a Dad in the class asked if when asking a child to do something if you should say "please". The teacher brought up a really good point that children deserve as much if not more respect (because they are learning) then adults. She was saying if we are home and our child gets in the way we are "move, watch out, don't step in front of me" but if we are in the street to a total stranger we say "excuse me". A new way of looking at it.

We have another one on a different subject coming up on the 20th.. we will see how it goes.


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